When I was in high school, I remember there was a big push for abstinence due to influence from the uber-Christians. There would always be that phrase, “Well, the only way to really prevent STDs is by abstinence!”
Obviously they never met my vibrator.
Being a girl comfortable in her sexuality from a very young age (even before losing the big V), I have always understood the wonderful powers of the vibrator in helping me understand what I like and to substitute whenever a man wasn’t around to play – or, in the case of my marriage, to use whenever my sexless husband was unwilling to have sex with me and fell asleep.
After the divorce, I realized that the devices I had to get to my favorite spots were not up to par. They definitely needed an upgrade. That’s when I went to the Pink Kitty.
The Pink Kitty is famous as the only sex shop in Irvine, Calif. (also known as ultra-suburbia – how a sex shop got in there I will never know), located in the corner of a remote industrial park off of MacArthur Boulevard. It’s clean, female-run and filled with every sex toy you can possibly think of and then some. When I went in, all I had was a cheapo rabbit vibrator, one of the most popular vibrators on the market courtesy of its famous episode in “Sex and the City.”
I went to the Pink Kitty shortly after my encounter with the Italian Stallion. I needed to look for a vibrator. The woman at first was skeptical as she scanned the toy wall.
“What do you like?” she said.
“Well, I had a rabbit…” I said.
“Everyone has or had a rabbit. It’s one of the hazards of ‘Sex and the City.’ But that may not be everyone’s cup of tea. Are you more clitoral? Do you need penetration? Do you like dual? Any anal toys?”
It was enough to make my head spin. I remember once seeing a vibrator that was a rabbit combined with an anal vibrator. It looked like a trident, and it scared even me.
The woman smiled and said, “It’s okay. Just if you want a rabbit, you would have to spend a lot of money to get a decent-quality one. There are other vibrators that are more reasonably priced that can get you better stimulation. But you have to know what you like.”
It was then that I was led through the wonderful and wacky world of sex toys, from toys for men (basically a mock vagina – creepy) to super-expensive toys I would need to pay a pretty penny to have.
“Well, I do like G-spot stimulation, and I have learned to squirt, but I like clitoral stimulation as well,” I mentioned.
“Oh, in that case try this one,” she said. She handed me a little purple vibrator, which was long and thin, but had an egg shape on top. “This will be able to help you work your G-spot, but can be used as clitoral stimulation as well. It’s pretty popular, and the price tag is good.” Sure enough, it was only $13 – much nicer than the rabbit, which runs much higher for a good one.
“Just one?” I asked. “What if I like other things?”
“Well, take your time. It takes a while to build a good toy box,” she said with a smile.
As I was paying for my vibrator and some condoms, I watched as visitors came in to look around – older couples of men and women who were scanning for sex toys and body paints, looking completely normal as if they were shopping for a pair of pants. I smiled to myself, thinking about my sexless marriage. These people were actually having sex, working on preserving their marriages. Good for them.
One day, I would hopefully be in their position with a partner who loves me, exploring sexuality together as a part of our journey. I am looking forward to that day. But in the meantime, I was going to enjoy myself on vibrator power.